Sometimes I wonder if my past ever existed

Or if it was a lie, like the cerulean sky

I used to think that there was a bright shining door

Full of opportunity, and I'd never have to cry

How could I ever have thought that I'd have a choice

When I know now that the world is a prison in a box

I try to find that happiness filled box

But only to find that it never existed

You ask me if I'm okay like it's a choice

I point to a wounded bird fallen from the sky

You look like you're about to cry

I hide my tears behind a slammed door

Sometimes I laugh as I stare at the door

The only exit from this small dark box

I laugh in order to tell myself not to cry

As I think about all the things that could've existed

I could go up to the top of the sky

But there is no point in making that choice

Why do you tell me that there's always a choice

When you're the one to lock me behind a mind's door

You whisper in my ear about the deep blue sky

Even when you know that I'm trapped in a box

Only one of us should've ever existed

In the end you won, I'm the one to cry

I had thought that there was nothing to do but cry

Then I saw that you were right in there being a choice

It's not like I had ever really existed

Other than being locked behind a skull of a door

I told myself that I'd get out of this box

Even if I had to pull down the sky

I only know what you told me about the sky

That it sometimes would turn gray and cry

I'd do anything to get out of this box

You leave me with no other choice

Killing you is the key to the door

In the end it's like you never existed

I have no proof that the sky ever existed

Since you've always left me to cry behind a locked door

To destroy the box I need to make this deadly choice

WRITTEN JUNE 2, 2013